Jordan Dane is the author of numerous award-winning books, and the YA book I read, IN THE ARMS OF STONE ANGELS, didn’t fail to impress. I was turned on to the novel by my critique partner, who promised me it was one of her absolute favs. Needless to say, I had high expectations. But they weren’t high enough, because this book was da’ friggin’ BOMB (do people still say that? I’m thinking no.). After reading this dark, sexy, and often funny book, I had to dive into the author’s head and see what else was tickin’ around in there. Enjoy this immensly serious interview.
1) 7:00 AM: coffee or orange juice?
Who the hell gets up at 7AM? Okay, okay, I prefer coffee in a syringe in the morning. I actually have such strange hours, that 7AM, I could be just heading off to sleep—after my dog Taco takes her pee break. Weird things hit me in the wee hours of the morning, even cold sober. Sometimes I get up and head straight for the ‘puter. With the voices in my head, it’s hard to sleep anyway. (Shut up! No, YOU shut up! Mom, she’s touching me.)
2) Would you rather have the power of invisibility, or the power to fly?
Flying would be seriously cool, but the first time a bug flew in my teeth, I’d freak. Nasty! I’d have to go with invisibility so I could see the boys of THE HUNGER GAMES movie naked. That is one movie I am really looking forward to. I’m following developments through my subscription of Entertainment Weekly and have the latest edition on my nightstand with Peeta and Gale looking at me. Yum! And Jen Lawrence will make a perfect Katniss. Saw her in Winter’s Bone. That girl has some serious acting chops.
3) Would you rather live on a tropical island with Snookie, or in Antarctica with Oprah?
Since I’d need alcohol for either choice, I’d have to pick Snookie. That girl travels liquid, I’m sure. She’d hook me up with a serious stash of umbrella drinks and after she “face plants” in the sand, I could use her to prop my feet up. Done!
4) If you could make it to where you only needed two hours of sleep at night, would you do it?
Two hours would be killer, right now. Man, that’s like sleeping in. I actually saw a sleep study thingee on NOVA that said we sleep in increments of 1.5 hours for 5 stages of REM, where we dream. I figure my brain is working all the time. I often come up with my best solutions for plots while I snooze. Dreams are believed to be the brain working out the problems that are worrying us. They are our practice tries, in a weird way, only with Leonardo DiCaprio and Cindy Lauper making guest appearances to a Kimya Dawson “I like Giants” sound track. If that’s the case, my answer would be “NO.” Why not let my 3 pounds of gray matter do all the work while I take a siesta? Just sayin.’
5) Would you rather be reincarnated as a cat, a dog, or a hippopotamus?
Man, tough call. Dogs sniff butts and lick their “Wu Haas.” Ew! Cats cough up hair balls and bathe with their tongues. Double Ew! Hippos swim and lounge in mud all day. Hummm. Guess I’d choose being a hippo and take the spa day.